Recommended books for adopters

Just starting to think about adoption for the first time? Going through the adoption process and want to know what's coming next? Living together with your adopted child and want to learn more about coping with thoughts and feelings?

CoramBAAF has the biggest and best range of books, guides and other resources to provide you with all the information, insight, advice and support you need. Here are some recommended readings for every step of your adoption journey.

First steps to adoption

Before you read anything else - read these first!

Adopting a child by Jenifer Lord

Adopting a Child by Jenifer Lord

The best-selling guide describes clearly what adoption means, the sorts of children waiting to be adopted and how to go about it (including a list of  UK adoption agencies). It is illustrated throughout with photographs and short case studies. 

For more information or to purchase, click here

 Our adoption journey by Jayne Lilley

Our Adoption Journey by Jayne Lilley

This is an inspirational account of a family's emotional journey to meeting their new daughter Jessie and growing as a family. Full of joyful highs and heartbreaking lows this deeply personal memoir follows Jayne, Dan and their son Charlie. 

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Adopting a child in Scotland by Robert Swift

Adopting a child in Scotland

This guide has been specifically written for prospective adopters in Scotland. It includes a wealth of information on adoptive processes and agencies across Scotland, as well as insightful stories from adoptive children.

For more information or to purchase, click here

The pink guide to adoption for lesbians and gay men by Nicola Hill

The pink guide to adoption for lesbians and gay men

This essential step-by-step guide, the first of its kind to be published in the UK, explores the adoption process and examines how being a prospective lesbian or gay adopter can and does affect every aspect of this. 

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 What does it feel like to adopt?

These real life stories explore the highs and lows of adoption. Written by adopters and carers, they reveal the hard times and the happy times, the waiting and hoping, the setbacks and disappointments, and the absolute joy of adopting a child!

An adoption diary by Maria James

An Adoption Diary by Maria James

This is true story follows Maria and Rob's journey to adopting a two-year-old child. Spanning almost four years, this enthralling diary chronicles the highs and lows along the way, until the approved adopters become parents for the very first time. 

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Together in time by Ruth Royce and Ed Royce

Together in Time by Ruth and Ed Royce

From a dual perspective, each with their own anxieties and expectations, Ruth and Ed look back on their decision to adopt a boy with attachment difficulties. It also explores the therapy methods they used. 

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Take two by Laurel Ashton

Take Two by Laurel Ashton

This candid account reveals the author's personal heartache at the realisation she cannot have a child of her own. It examines the emotional and physical demands of IVF and how and why adoption was the right choice for this family. 

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 Dale's tale by Helen Jayne

Dale's Tale by Helen Jayne

This is the story of a foster carer, Helen, and what happened when Dale joined her family as a foster child. When his short-term placement becomes longer than expected, the family, inevitably, grow attached to Dale and he to them.

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Inspiring anthologies

Adopters and carers come together to share their inspiring stories of adoption. 

Looking after our own edited by Hope Massiah

Looking after our own edited by Hope Massiah

This inspiring collection looks at the experiences of nine black and Asian adoptive families and their children. It explores their motivation to adopt, what social workers offered, the roles of friends and family and what adoption meant to them. 

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As if I was a real boy by Gordon and Jeannie Mackenzie

As if I was a real boy

This is the inspirational story of how Gordon, who was 10 and living in a pyschiatric hospital with an undiagnosed mental illness, was adopted by Jeannie. Both mother and son look back at the ways adoption changed their lives for the better.

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Proud parents by Nicola Hill

Proud parents by Nicola Hill

This is a collection of stories of lesbian and gay men who have adopted or fostered children. Single and in partnerships, they share their experiences on a number of issues, including motivation, assessment process and their childrens reaction.

For more information or to purchase, click here

Loving and living with traumatised children by Megan Hirst

Loving and living with traumatised children by Megan Hirst

Based on the experiences of nine individuals who adopted traumatised children, this book looks at the "co-operative enquiry" (action research) they established to investigate the effects of their child's trauma on themselves.

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The next step

Whether you're looking for guidance on the preparation and assessment process, signposts to services or information for your family and friends, we've got the right books, whatever the stage of your adoption journey.

The adopter's handbook by Amy Neil Slater

The adopter's handbook by Amy Neil Salter

A 'must have' guide to help families help themselves throughout the adoption process and afterwards. This handbook provides detailed information about many of the issues involved in adoption, and identifies support and resources.

For more information or to purchase, click here

Related by adoption by Hedi Argent

Related by Adoption by Hedi Argent

This sensitively written handbook gives relatives information about adoption and how it will affect them. Using cases, it shows how they can support building new families through adoption and the positive roles they can play.

For more information or to purchase, click here

Approaching fatherhood: a guide for adoptive dads by Paul May

Approaching Fatherhood by Paul May

In this book, adoptive fathers' experiences are combined with a guide to the adoption process - from the mans POV. It examines what kind of dads these adoptive fathers are, how they tick and what they make of the families they create.

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Understanding your adopted child 

These books reveal insights into an adopted child's emotions and behaviour.

Attachment, trauma and resilience by Kate Cairns and Brian Cairns

Attachment, trauma and resilience by Kate and Brian Cairns

In this remarkable book, Kate and Brian drawn upon their personal and professional experience to offer an insight into the realities of family life with children who have lived through overwhelming stress, loss, abuse and trauma.

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A child's journey through placement by Vera I Fahlberg, MD

A child's journey through placement

Separation, loss, grief and change are experiences common to children requiring permanent placements. This book contains the theoretical knowledge base and skills necessary for understanding and planning for these children.

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In search of belonging edited by Perlita Harris

In search of belonging by Perita Harris

This highly original anthology of poetry, artwork, autobiography, memoir and oral testimony gives voice to transracially over 50 adopted children and adults, ranging in age from six to 56 from countries like Kenya and Sri Lanka.

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Mother me by Zara H Phillips

Mother me by Zara H Phillips

In this intensely personal and compelling memoir, Zara examines her relationships with her adoptive and birth mothers, and invites the reader to join her in her own journey to become a mother. It explores childhood, adolescene and relationships.

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 Every parent needs some advice after adoption

Do you need help with those difficult conversations post-adoption? Do you want some advice with how to tell the truth about an adopted child's origins? These resources offer support and practical guides to managing complex situations after adoption. 

Why was I adopted? by Jane Jackson

Why was I adopted: helpful answers to your child's big adoption questions

This short guide provides helpful answers to your child's big adoption questions - which can often be difficult, unexpected, confounding and even challenging. This book also explores the feelings and worries that can lie behind a child's questions. 

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Talking about adoption to your adopted child by Marjorie Morrison

Talking about adoption to your adopted child

This guide outlines the whys, whens and hows of telling the truth to your adopted child. It is packed with practical ideas suitable for children of all ages, and the wealth of information is brought to life with detailed case studies.

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Promoting attachment and resilience by Gillian Schofield and Mary Beek

Promoting attachment and resilience: a guide for foster carers and adopters on using the secure base model

This practical guide is designed to support adopters in offering the best possible sensitive care for troubled children who have often experienced trauma and loss - by using the 'Secure Base' model of caregiving (which is comprehensively outlined).

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Facing up to Facebook by Eileen Fursland

Facing up to Facebook: a survival guide for adoptive families

This survival guide to social media for adoptive families explores a wide range of questions and concerns for the Facebook age. For example, how do you manage complex situations that arise from unauthorised and unmediated contact?

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Children's books to share with your adopted child

These stories, all with strong but subtle moral messages, have been carefully constructed and chosen for your adopted child. 

The most precious present in the world by Becky Edwards

The most precious present in the world by Becky Edwards

Why isn't Mia's hair straight like her mums? Why aren't Mia's eyes blue? Why does being adopted make Mia feel confused? This simply written yet engaging story touches upon profound themes of seperation, belonging and difference. 

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A safe place for Rufus by Jill Seeney

A safe place for Rufus by Jill Seeney

Rufus the cat lives with a family who cares for him, and so he feels happy and safe. But he didn't always feel this way and thinking about the past makes him angry. This book explores the importance of feeling secure and banishing fears.

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Picnic in the park by Joe Griffiths and Tony Pilgrim

Picnic in the Park

This vividly illustrated book introduces children to a range of family structures, including single parents, adoptive and foster families, gay and lesbian families and step families. It aims to encourage acceptance and understanding. 

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Finding a family for Tommy by Rebecca Daniel

Finding a family for Tommy by Rebecca Daniel

Tommy needs a new family to give him lots of love, but where will he find one? On a farm? At the zoo? This lift-the-flap picture book introduces children to the idea of different families and addresses belonging within the adoption process.

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Download 'Read About Adoption' for more recommendations