Ian and Jason’s story - the positives totally outweigh the negatives
Where it all began...
“We had talked about having children before, and one day we asked each other the ‘what if’ question. We looked at our options and decided that if we were going to do this then adopting would be the best way forward.
We found out about Coram through a search online, and after going along to their drop in information event, we were happy to progress with them. Soon after, we were assigned a social worker who has been with us every step of the way.
Fast forward a few months...
After a setback with a potential match, we were contacted about two brothers aged two and three. We had to try and keep ourselves grounded, trying not to build our hopes up like before.
As time went on, we got more and more positive vibes about the boys, and after meetings with the boys’ social worker and doctor we made it known that we wanted to adopt them. It was great to know that we we were being supported in our adoption application by all parties.
We met the boys for the first time and they stayed with us after two weeks of introductions. The boys’ foster carer had done a superb job in preparing them. We produced a book to give to the boys with photographs of the home and we called ourselves ‘Dad’ and ‘Daddy’.
We have been exceptionally lucky that the boys settled in so well. I don’t think either of us initially had much of a clue about changing nappies and dealing with a screaming two and three year old! Having a niece or nephew to look after for the day doesn’t really prepare you, but then again I’m sure that every new parent feels the same.
The training courses at Coram helped to prepare us, and we know that we can always call on Coram for help and advice if needed. We know in time the boys will no doubt have questions about their past - we will prepare for that when the time comes.
The boys are now are enjoying pre-school and nursery school, growing much in confidence. They are both really intelligent for their ages, love reading and being read to. Swimming is a family favourite on a Sunday and we’ve even subscribed to the National Trust as the boys love the outdoors.
We didn't start out with any set criteria of what child we wanted, as we wanted to keep an open mind. It was wonderful to be able to give a home to two little boys. Adoption is life-changing and you have to be 100% realistic about what it entails. But the positives totally outweigh the negatives. Looking at your child that smiles back or calls you Dad or Daddy and comes for a cuddle melts your heart.
Our first Christmas was really special and the boys spent time with our respective families. Both sets of grandparents have taken really well to the boys and it was a lovely moment when we had a Celebration Hearing with the Judge which was attended by our parents, family and social worker. This was the final chapter of our two year journey.”